Growing within these walls
A nest of bacteria feeds;
It finds my thoughts and seeks
To swell them like giant balls.
They roll, roll, make themselves bigger:
Like fat piles of snow,
Until they finally explode.
Over these months, I have drunken,
Filled with too much of me.
There's no other world, but I,
And that's the reality.
While others do have the need
To let out their inner screams;
Mine are dull and unbidden,
So I'll keep them just to me.
In a world choked with fires,
I have come to learn,
The flame of a little lighter
Will nearly go unseen.
And I can't help but dread,
At the thread of uncertainty,
Which comes undone, stitches ripping,
And there, in a hole, I see…
How will I swim that torrent,
the waves of this enormous ocean,
If a glass of water is enough
To find myself drowning?
The waves are flat, though,
And for now, I just float,
As there’s nothing more to do:
To have my back to the water,
Close my eyes shut,
Slowly drift away…
and wait.
